We are doing nothing today. That's what J wanted, so that is what we are doing. We skipped church, we played video games together this morning (he's still up there now, will probably be there for the rest of the day) and then I began sorting through what we have for Bennett.
Thanks to my requests for non-gender specific sheets and blankets when I was pregnant with Charlotte, and the clothes shopping I can't seem to stop myself from doing, we have everything for Bennett aside from diaper wipes. I am hesitant to buy too many clothes because Charlotte was so small. I don't think Bennett will be 5 lbs like his sister so I've stocked up on 0-3 months and 3-6 month clothes and if we need more newborn sizes (I have a take home outfit and a couple sleepers) we'll buy them after he's born.
There are some items we will definitely not need. I have 10 receiving blankets, 4 swaddle blankets, 4 fluffy fleece blankets and 2 sleep sacks. I think he will be warm enough come winter.
As I was making piles of clothes and blankets in the co-sleeper I wondered if Bennett will ever use the co-sleeper, or need the clothes or diapers. Yesterday we went to Costco to pick up a few items. I had a coupon for diapers but couldn't bring myself to use it because the box said up to 16 lbs on it and I can't imagine Bennett coming home with us and becoming a 16 lb baby. I did, however, buy three sleepers. Can someone please explain this to me? My grief addled brain seems to be lacking all logic.
I can't believe we're ready for Bennett when I am only 27 weeks. Is setting up the nursery a sign of hope or simply a means of distraction? To be completely honest I just want to be at the end of this pregnancy. I want to know if he's alive or not, if he's here with us.
I have the clothes, random baby gear, stroller, car seat, crib, co-sleeper ... I just need a living baby.
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Saint-Malo: Around Town
5 hours ago
5 comments:
'I have the clothes, random baby gear, stroller, car seat, crib, co-sleeper ... I just need a living baby.'
Me too. The details vary slightly, but the sentiment is exactly the same.
All I wanted from the beginning of this pregnancy was just a glimpse of the end of this month, to know whether he makes it. Still hoping....
Could've written this post myself when I was pregnant with Angus.
xo
I had such similar thoughts and processes when I was pregnant with Ernest. Especially the last two paragraphs.
You are doing great, just keep on hanging in there. x
I too can relate to your feelings, especially of just wanting to be done and see the outcome. You are doing good though! You are far more ready than I am, and I only have 3wks until my due date! I guess I am still just holding my breath to see if I get to bring home a baby this time so I feel hesitant in doing too much to get ready. :/
I know that feeling. It's easy to buy the fun stuff but when you're thinking of the practical stuff you have to actually visualize the baby there with you and that's tough. I wasn't able to do that until Caleb was home and even now I can't really make plans for too far in the future because I still worry something could happen. If you find a way to fix that anxious feeling please share!!
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