Friday, April 12, 2019

bad attitudes and sibling squabbles

It's 9:45 on Friday morning and the house is QUIET. Harper is napping, the others are out of the house ... I'm basically alone!

One of the biggest homeschooling challenges for me is the constant presence of people. Quiet time to myself is rare, but being an introvert I crave space and quiet.

I was going to sit and read, but I'm having a terrible time finding a book with content I feel comfortable reading. New fiction is often chock full of things I don't want in my brain. I read a lot of non-fiction, but I can't read just non-fiction because that wears my brain out.

I need to start on my get out and walk goal today. The weather has been so horrible - we have pockets of flooding around town because the skies have been weeping endlessly - but being from here I was born to walk in the rain and not mind. That's the general mindset at least. I'm more of a whiner. And I hate feeling the slightest bit uncomfortable.

The weather is wearing on everyone. The kids have been fighting like mad lately. Any tips on what to do about that? They've always been mostly friendly with each other, but lately there's been a lot of strife. I need to find new strategies to deploy when they begin bickering. Yelling, "Jesus put you in this family! He gave you your siblings! Love one another!" isn't working.

My capacity to stay calm goes up in flames after a long day. Or even a long morning. I'm working on gentle speech - and I do feel I'm yelling less - but when the fighting starts all calm vanishes.

Yesterday the making dinner hour was so stressful I nearly ran away screaming. There are days I want to put dinner on the table and let the family have at it while I eat in a quiet room behind a closed door. Harper broke a glass water bottle I didn't realize was in the baby drawer. And in the midst of a sibling scuffle Ains had a fairly hefty board dropped on her eye (the platform of the helper tower actually) which resulted in copious tears and ice packs. By the time Jon came home from work I was completely overdone and grumpy. Lately each day is something to get through; a test of endurance. I think we'd all fare better if I didn't feel that way. Oh attitudes - they always need improving, don't they?

I'm going to jump off now. Harper just woke and it's not raining so I'm going to walk before I lose my motivation.

Tuesday, April 9, 2019

5 things I want to do

A friend snapped a photo of me talking to Harper during swim lessons today.

She sent it to me with an uplifting message about how I'm a great mom. I was like, that's so sweet! But I don't love my hair and profile shots are the worst and I hope no one sees it ...

And then I shared it on Instagram. Because if people look at me and see how much I love my children that's a good great thing.

I read through Girl, Stop Apologizing (which was so-so) recently and Rachel Hollis talks a lot about goals. When I thought about what I really want to accomplish personally I kept coming back to: spend more time on myself.

As I've thought about that more over the last few weeks I've realized there are concrete things I can and want to do for myself.

1. Get my hair cut every 6 weeks. Why do I wait 6 months to get my hair cut? I love having it done!

2. Take care of my skin. I'm in my 30s. I need to find a good skin care regime that's non-toxic and easy. Unless drinking water and washing my face with water is enough. If that's the case: done!

3. Walk at least 3x a week. And I mean really walk. Taking three kids and a dog around the neighborhood raises my heart rate because it's super stressful, but it is not what I would call a productive walk. I'm not going to do yoga or run or swim or bike, but I need to get in shape and I can walk.

4. Learn how to put on makeup. I'll probably wear it twice a year, but knowing how to put it on seems like something I could learn. I have never worn makeup and I can't see myself spending a lot of time on this one, but it's way out of my comfort zone so I'm adding it in. Please tell me there's a super simple way to do this.

5. Stay off sugar. It's spring. I just want to eat everything and cry. We've done really well keeping added cane sugar out of our daily lives. It's been almost a year and I want to stick with it. Finding the motivation when I feel sad is really hard.

5 things - that seems possible! Send all tips and tricks my way. I'm going to need help - especially with that fourth one - and accountability.

Wait - I posted this on Facebook and then realized I missed something huge.

So # 6 - which should be # 1: be consistent about spending time in the Bible. I really, really need to get back in this habit!!


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